We are taught not to let sin control us, not to let sin run our lives. What does that mean? up until 3 minutes ago, i believed that to mean we shouldnt be adicted to sin, not to let lust run our thoughts, not to let greed determine what we do for work, not to let selfishness outweigh Gods plan. thats what i was tought, and thats what i believed. Crying out to God, i tell him that i dont want sin to run my life, im distrought when i sin, im torn up inside. I feel like im distanced from God. Somebody somewhere in my life told me that "when you sin, the only thing God will hear from you is a prayer to ask his forgiveness..." that statement tainted my perspective on God for along time. You cant piss off God. his love is uncondititional, human love says that if you wrong me, you need to make it up to me before we can be close again, Gods love isnt like that though. When we wrong God he is crying for us to come back to Him, he is preparing for our return, he misses us like in the story Jesus told about the prodigal son.
I dont want sin to control my life, so when i do sin, i get really hard on myself. to try and stop myself from doing it again, to try and guilt myself out of it. maybe even to make sure God knows how sorry i am. but by doing that, im letting sin control my thoughts and emotions.
When we forget Gods forgiveness, his grace, his mercy, his unconditional love, and allow ourselves to focus on our sin, we are giving it more control.
Now there are times to be broken, and times to be really really torn up about our sin. But when we take that to far, and dont let ourselves enjoy Gods presence, and when we cant see God because we are so occupied worrying about our own sin - it becomes sin in itself.
The Message puts it tis way...
28-30"The older brother stalked off in an angry sulk and refused to join in. His father came out and tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't listen. The son said, 'Look how many years I've stayed here serving you, never giving you one moment of grief, but have you ever thrown a party for me and my friends? Then this son of yours who has thrown away your money on whores shows up and you go all out with a feast!'
31-32"His father said, 'Son, you don't understand. You're with me all the time, and everything that is mine is yours—but this is a wonderful time, and we had to celebrate. This brother of yours was dead, and he's alive! He was lost, and he's found!'"
God (the father in this story) didnt yell at his son. he didnt belittle him for wasting all his money on whores. he didnt point out all the things that his son did wrong. His son came home, broken and truly sorry for what he did, and his father threw him a party! "how awesome that my son is sorry for what he did!"
likewise when we sin, and we come back to God, asking his forgiveness he gives it to us freely! without holding a grudge, without expecting us to go live in the barn with the pigs from now on (even when we feel thats what we deserve) no, He has prepared us the best food, he has planned a party, He missed us. and is so happy that we are back.
20-21"When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him. The son started his speech: 'Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son ever again.'
22-24"But the father wasn't listening. He was calling to the servants, 'Quick. Bring a clean set of clothes and dress him. Put the family ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Then get a grain-fed heifer and roast it. We're going to feast! We're going to have a wonderful time! My son is here—given up for dead and now alive! Given up for lost and now found!' And they began to have a wonderful time.
